38 weeks!

Warning: At risk of sounding like an ungrateful bitch- this post contains copious whining. You all know I wouldn't change this situation for the world but I am oh.so.cranky. I don't know what to do with myself. I just want to lie down and read a book or surf the net but my house is like a bomb hit it and so I feel guilty because I should be putting things away but I'm overwhelmed because I don't know where to start. B is at school and he has been working so hard and still has waited on me hand and foot and I really should have dinner ready for him when he gets home tonight but the thought of cooking dinner is overwhelming. If tidying the kitchen and cooking dinner is overwhelming then how am I going to manage being the mother of an infant, which is something I still can't get my head around and at the same time I wish he would come out already because I am so big and I can't beathe and my cervix is nowhere to be found and there are still no beds at the hospital and my pubic bones hurt and my heel hurts and I can't sleep and my arms go numb and everybody thinks it funny because I'm a control freak who has no control and I want to tell them all to fuck off! Thursday can't come soon enough!!